Dana Loesch : “Where’s My Award For Being Beaten And Body Slammed By Gun Grabbing,Violent Leftists At CNN’s Town Hall?

Dana Loesch at CNN Town Hall, prior to getting beaten, body slammed, lynched, and burned at the stake by violent, gun grabbing leftists dressed as professional wrestlers.

When Dana Loesch found out that Anderson Cooper and CNN had received The prestigious Walter Cronkite award for excellence in journalism for its 2018 Town Hall on gun violence, she was so jealous that she recently appeared on Tucker Carlson Tonight to complain how shameful it was that she hadn’t received her own award for having her ass handed to her by the Parkland students.

Seriously, people, is this a joke?” the conservative pundit and NRA spokesperson, tweeted in reaction to the news.

Seriously, people, is this a joke? I think I deserve an award for all of the abuse I had to endure from the misguided students who were repeating everything the gun grabbing, legacy media told them to say, like screaming shame on you, and hang the b***h, instead of having a real conversation about how awesome the NRA and guns are.

“Honestly, I can’t believe that CNN was awarded the Walter Cronkite for excellence in political journalism when everyone there was so mean to me,” she told Carlson. “I was literally booed, shamed, spit on, hissed at, tarred and feathered, stoned, beaten to a bloody pulp, shot, stabbed, water boarded, drawn and quartered, gassed, fried to a crisp, boiled alive, staked, beheaded, torn to shreds, hanged, lynched, crucified, and finally, burned at the stake. Then they took my ashes, put them in jar, and pi**ed all over them. Does that sound like advancing the conversation to you, Tucker?”

Carlson : “It sounds like outright murder to me. It seems like the whole event was staged, and they were ready to murder you from the moment you walked through the door, rather than let you speak. So typical of the violent left.”

“I mean, seriously,” Loesch continued, “not only that, but there was a mob of people there who were dressed like professional wrestlers, carrying signs that said, ‘Kill The B***h Queen, and ‘Blame All Law Abiding Gun Owners For Mass Shootings! Confiscate Their Guns And Kill Them, Too!’ All of them carried nooses, too.

“When they noticed me eyeing them nervously, they all rushed the stage at once, screaming, ‘Burn the witch!’ and ‘Hang The B***h!’ Several people tried to stop them, but we’re unable to prevent them from getting up on stage. There were just too many of them, and they were determined to kill me. First they took turns body slamming me like professional wrestlers do, using their elbows to inflict unbearable pain and damage on me, and then they teamed up and kept pouncing and pouncing, and slamming and slamming, until I was literally a pancake. After they finished, they posed for pictures with each other with my flattened corpse on display between them, like fisherman posing with their catch. Most of the audience, including the Parkland students, were laughing and encouraging them to kill me, while only a few were actually horrified at how I was being treated.

“When they were finished with me,” she continued, “they took turns punishing the few that tried to stop them from manhandling me. They did the same things to them that they did to me. One of them was senator Marco Rubio. Earlier he had been asked by one of the students if he would continue to accept donations from the NRA. You could tell how angry they were when he told them no. They wanted to kill him on the spot, and take his guns. But I believe they were biding their time, probably waiting to kill me first, and then senator Rubio, probably hoping to make a spectacle and an example of both of us, which evidently they managed to accomplish. They finished me off, and those who tried to defend me, and then they went after Rubio, doing the exact same things to him that they did to me. And as I was leaving the building, an insane leftist charged me from behind, screaming she was going to kill me, and stuff my corpse in the barrel of my AR-15, but thank God someone was able stop this one.”

Carlson : “Unbelievable! Exactly when did all of this happen, Dana? As far as I know, CNN didn’t televise anyone getting body slammed, or flattened like a pancake, much less getting stoned, shot, or stabbed.”

“Well, of course not, Tucker. CNN was not about to show what their sham of a town hall was really all about, which was putting on a WWE style event, and pretending that it was all about guns and how dangerous they are, while humiliating me and law abiding gun owners, and trying to make us look like fools, but succeeding only in making themselves look like fools. All of this happened after the cameras were turned off, Tucker, because they didn’t want anyone to see how violent and unhinged the leftist, gun hating mobs are. If they had left the cameras rolling, everyone would have sided with the NRA, and would realize just how awesome guns really are.”

Carlson : “I totally agree. To put on a display of violence just days after a massacre, is despicable, and totally typical of the violent left.”

“That’s right, Tucker. But what bothers me more than anything else is, I should have won that award, not CNN. I showed up to prove how awesome guns are, and I believe that’s exactly what I did.”

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#cnn, #dana-loesch, #nra, #satire-humor, #tucker-carlson, #walter-cronkite, #wwe

Charlie Kirk’s Pants Fall Down At Politicon Debate!

http://www.joemygod.com/2018/10/21/charlie-kirk-flips-out-at-young-turks-founder-video/

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Politicon took place over this past weekend , and it was quite an event to say the least. People of all political persuasions attended the event to see their favorite pundit , or their favorite celebrity. Among the attendees were conservatives Tomi Lahren , Scottie Nell Hughes , and Tucker Carlson of the Fox News Network. On the progressive side were Cenk Uygur , Ana Kasparian , Hassan Piker , Sam Seder , and Kyle Kulinski of the Young Turks Network.

Among the featured notables from past years events were popular speakers Ann Coulter , and Ben Shapiro , both Fox News contributors. The pair was originally scheduled to debate social Democrat Kyle Kulinski of Secular Talk and the Young Turks Network. But , for some reason , both backed out at the last-minute.

Most of the event was uneventful in terms of excitement. The majority of the debaters managed to behave in a civilized manner , without insulting each other. However , during one debate between the Young Turk’s Hasan Piker and TPUSA’s Charlie Kirk , things got quickly heated and embarrassing.

Near the end of the debate , as the two were involved in a near shouting match , Kirk asked Piker to reveal his salary or go live in a socialist commie country like Venezuela.

At that moment , he was heckled by the founder of the Young Turks Network , Cenk Uygur ( pronounced Jank ) who was sitting in the audience with his colleague , Anna Kasparian.

Uygur stood up and shouted , “Hasan will tell you how much he makes when you tell us what kind of diapers you wear and who buys them for you!”

All I did was ask Charlie to reveal what type of diaper he wears and who buys them for him. I wanted to know if his rich donors also buy his diapers , and he flipped out! I thought he might jumped off stage , pounce on me and try to rub his diaper in my face. Wow! Totally unexpected.

There was piercing laughter from most of the liberals and progressives in the crowd. Even some of Kirk’s fans laughed , but many of them also booed.

“You could tell Charlie was embarrassed ,” a witness told the Journal. “But he was more angry than embarrassed. For a moment or two he sat there with his face turning red , scowling as the audience laughed at him. He looked like a petulant two-year old whose mommy had just told him to stand in the corner. The few that weren’t laughing , either looked angry or as embarrassed as he did.

“Then something completely unexpected happened , and that was when all hell broke loose , and things started to get really interesting. Charlie shot to his feet and glared at Uygur. Then he made a move toward the edge of the stage as if he wanted to challenge Uygur to a fight. Piker and the moderator shot to their feet , anticipating a confrontation between the two. And that’s when the unexpected happened. Just before the moderator and Piker could restrain him , Charlie’s pants fell down!

“I guess they weren’t zipped up all the way and fell down almost immediately after he stood up.”

The laughter started to die down as Kirk , Piker , and the moderator rose to their feet.

“When Charlie’s pants fell down , all remaining laughter ceased ,” the witness continued. “The audience was stunned into complete silence. The moderator and Piker said oh my God at the same time and backed away. Piker looked disgusted. The moderator looked confused , as if he couldn’t decide whether to be disgusted , shocked , or surprised.

“Jaws dropped and eyes bugged out , including my own. You can probably guess what Charlie was wearing under his pants. That’s right. You guessed it. He was wearing diapers.

” ‘I wear pampers , Cenk!’ Charlie shouted. ‘I wear them every day , okay?! I buy them myself! Nobody buys them for me! I’m proud to wear them because it owns the libs! And you know what else? I like wearing them not only to own the libs , I like wearing them because they’re soft , they’re plush , they have giraffes and other animals on them , and they’re water proof! You can’t get that in any other diaper! That’s why I recommend them to my family , friends , and all my followers! You want to make something of it?! Come on Cenk , let’s go!’

“That’s when all hell broke loose. The moment he stopped shouting at Uygur , the entire audience erupted in laughter. They couldn’t help it. They had been holding it in the whole time he had been screaming at Uygur.

“The image of Charlie Kirk and his followers in baby diapers to own the libs , was funny enough , but to see it first hand , was hilarious. People were rolling around on the floor , holding onto one another , or doubled over in laughter. Almost everyone in the audience was in tears , they were laughing so hard , including myself. My sides ached from laughing so hard.

“Some of Charlie’s own fans and most of the MAGA hatters had also completely lost it. One guy in a MAGA hat was on the floor with his face buried in his arms , his shoulders and back heaving. At first I thought he was crying , but then I realized he was laughing. An old woman in a Trump Tee shirt was also on the floor , kicking her feet and pounding her fists. She looked like she might be having a tantrum , but she was also laughing. Another guy in a Trump America Tee shirt , was on his back on the floor , holding onto his stomach as if he were afraid it would fly away as he laughed. Two teenage girls next to him were holding onto each other as they laughed hysterically.

“Passersby glanced curiously at the crowd , wondering what the hell was going on.

“There were very few people who weren’t laughing. Those that weren’t laughing , were some of Charlie’s more serious followers. They looked absolutely embarrassed. Most of them were shaking their heads and or glancing sheepishly toward the rooms exits as if they were wondering if they could get out without being noticed. I felt kind of sorry for them. Their whole purpose in life is to own the libs. But they certainly failed to own the libs last year during their first diaper stunt , and they certainly won’t own the libs with this one. All that will happen , I suspect , is that the libs will own them by ridiculing them on-line like they did the last time.

“Charlie scowled at the audience for nearly a minute , his face turning redder with each passing second. Then he angrily threw down the microphone he had been holding and attempted run off the stage as quickly as he could with his pants around his ankles , which apparently wasn’t easy. He tripped twice , drawing more laughter from the crowd , and finally made it back stage.

“I felt kind of sorry for Charlie. He was never going to hear the end of this. The libs were going to make his life miserable. But I also thought it was funny as hell.

#ana-kasparian, #cenk-uygur, #charlie-kirk, #fox-news, #kyle-kulinski, #politicon, #tpusa, #tucker-carlson

A Mob Of Leftists Call For The Lynching Of Tucker Carlson

https://townhall.com/columnists/pauljacob/2018/09/23/the-left-strings-up-tucker-carlson-n2521635

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Carlson posing for his douche award photo.

Tucker Carlson is a Fox News commentator , sexist , race baiter , and a douche. He’s a co-founder and the editor in chief of the tabloid style news site , The Daily Caller.

In 2006 he appeared as a dancer on Dancing With The Stars , despite not really being a star , and in 2015 he appeared on Info Wars proving to everyone just how ridiculous he is by claiming that the Democratic party wants to execute gun owners.

From 2000 to 2005 he was at CNN where he hosted the Spin Room , which was quickly cancelled. In 2001 he was co-host of Cross Fire. He also hosted Tucker Carlson Unfiltered on PBS.

From 2005 to 2008 he was at MSNBC , where he hosted The Situation With Tucker Carlson , which was cancelled after three years.

In 2009 Carlson was hired as a Fox news contributor , made frequent appearances as a guest host on Greg Gutfeld’s unfunny satire show , Red Eye With GG , and occasionally sat in for Hannity. In 2016 he became the host of Tucker Carlson Tonight , which was a mid-season replacement for On The Record.

Recently , Carlson received criticism for a segment he did about changing racial demographics in the United States. Liberals perceived it as racist , but many conservatives came out in Carlson’s defense , complaining that Carlson had been falsely accused ( see above Townhall article ) of racism , that it was nothing more than libtard media political correctness , because libtards are the real racists. All they do is play the race card because of identity politics by supporting minority groups like Black Lives Matter , gays , transgenders , and keeping African-Americans on the Democratic plantation with bribes of food stamps and welfare so they will vote Democrat ( because helping people in time of need is somehow racist ) , as opposed to Republican voter suppression , which affects not only African , but white Americans ( which is somehow , not racist ) , and an obsession with preventing brown people from crossing the border for fear they will infiltrate America and steal everyone’s jobs , leading to the evils of multiculturalism and diversity.

On a recent episode of Carlson Tonight , Carlson told his viewers that leftist mobs were coming to lynch him.

“First it was mobs of angry , intolerant leftists , led by Colin Kaepernick , kneeling in disrespect to our troops and the American flag. Then it was the NRA’s Dana Loesch who was attacked by an intolerant mob of leftists at this years CNN town hall on gun violence , in which she barely escaped with her life. Then again , it was supreme court nominee Brett Kavanaugh who was viciously attacked by leftist mobs of gays , cross dressers , and transgenders , because they didn’t want him on the court , over the questionable testimony of Christine Blasey Ford.

“Now , yours truly is under attack from the same angry , and intolerant leftist crowd of gays , cross dressers , and transgenders. Why , you ask? Good question. I can’t think of a single reason why leftists would want me dead. It’s just in their nature. Leftists are naturally violent. All they know is violence.

“Recently , I did a segment on this show about changing racial demographics that most Americans oppose , and as a result , liberal heads exploded because they couldn’t handle the truth of what I was saying. But they also exploded in anger. After that segment aired , a mob of angry leftists showed up outside these very studios looking to lynch me. They were carrying pitch forks , nooses , tiki torches , and signs that read , Hang The Honky , He Hates Black People , Carlson Is A Sexist Pig , Let’s Roast Him – which , I assume , is what the pitch forks were for – He’s A White Nationalist , Let’s Roast Him For That Too , and Tuck The Cuck , which is absurd , since I am anything but a race traitor , nor am I espousing liberal values. Perhaps they were just making fun of me , who knows.

“Anyway , as I left this building to head home that night , I had to be escorted by security to my car. The leftist mob was waiting to harass and heckle me. They indeed had nooses , pitch forks , and tiki torches too. They chanted roast the pig , roast the Cuck , let’s have bacon and Tuck. I was afraid for my life. I knew if I didn’t get out of there , they were indeed going to roast me like a pig , eat me , and celebrate my death in an orgy of leftist mob frenzy.”

“Tucker is full of s**t ,” an anonymous source who witnessed the ‘mob’ , told the Journal. “The only mob waiting for him were four little old ladies who told him he should be ashamed of himself for being a douche and a putz. And , get this , one of them happened to be a former baby sitter of his , who grabbed him by the ear and said she was telling his mommy what a bad boy he had been.

“Tucker was so triggered by the confrontation that he started crying and begged her not to tell his mommy.”

#colin-kaepernick, #fox-news, #leftist-mob, #multiculturalism, #satire, #tucker-carlson

Stupid Conservative Memes # 67 Tomi Lahren Edition

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🍁 Tomi Lahren is one of those conservatives who often doesn’t have a clue what they are talking about. In this case complaining about mainstream media. It’s ironic that they fail to realize that they themselves are a part of the mainstream media. Any form of entertainment , be it news , radio , movies , television  , and magazines , it’s all mainstream. It makes no difference whether it’s left or right. Rupert Murdoch owns a vast media entertainment empire , including newspapers in the United Kingdom , the United States , dozens of cable channels , and Fox News. Glenn Beck owns a television , radio network of news and entertainment including an internet entertainment channel. Rush Limbaugh is mainstream. Michael Savage is mainstream. Glenn Beck is mainstream. They see themselves as truth and objectivity in a sea of liberalism. They see themselves as “real news” , and anyone else who doesn’t agree with or promote the conservative opinion or view of the world , whether it be entertainment or politics , is “fake news” or has a “liberal bias.” The irony is that pundits  like Dana Loesch , Megan Kelly , Shawn Hannity , Tucker Carlson , and Rush Limbaugh are every bit as elite – earning salaries in the millions – and mainstream as the so-called liberal  mainstream media elites they so often bitch and moan about. And now that Trump is president , they have their heads buried firmly up his ass.  None of them more blatant in their ass licking than  Tomi.          

 

 

#dana-loesch, #fox-news, #glenn-beck, #mainstream-media, #megan-kelly, #rush-limbaugh, #shawn-hannity, #stupid-conservative-memes, #tomi-lahren, #tucker-carlson