Posted in Alex Jones, Katie Pavlich, satire/humor, Victoria Jackson

Bike Gate : Barack Obama’s Sixth Bloodiest Scandal : How Obama Smuggled Drugs To Mexican Drug Cartels In American Bicycles , Because He Hates Bicycles Like He Hates Guns And Wants To Outlaw Them Like He Wants To Outlaw Guns

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The King of kooks , crackpots , wackos , and fruitcakes.

From the Alex Jones Radio Show , December 26 , 2016 – 

“Welcome to the show , ladies and gentlemen. I’m Alex Jones , your host for the number one show in Texas and around the world.  

“We have two guests on today’s show. One is supposed to be a well-respected journalist who is the editor-in-chief for Town Hall.com , and a regular contributor to the Fox News channel. She’s written articles for Red State , and World Net Daily , which is one of the most credible sites on the internet in my opinion.  She’s written such gems as Golf Gate , and Vacation Gate , exposing Obama’s fascination with playing too much golf and taking too many vacations. She’s also written the definitive book on the Fast And Furious scandal ,  Barack Obama’s Bloodiest Scandal And It’s Shameless Cover Up. Her name is Katie Pavlich.

“My other guest isn’t so well-respected. In fact , she’s a well-known kook , crackpot , wacko , and an all around fruitcake. She’s also written some books about Obama , some of them so insane you would have to be just as much of a kook , a crackpot , wacko , and an all around fruitcake as she is , to read them and take them seriously. And believe me , every one of her fans are kooks , crackpots , wackos , and all around fruitcakes , because they do read them and take them seriously. Her name is Victoria Jackson , and together they’ve written a new book which is scheduled to be published next year by Obama Hates America Publishers.

Victoria : “Jeez , thanks a lot , Alex. I really appreciate the introduction.”

Alex : “You’re welcome , Victoria. Katie , what I can’t understand is why you chose to do a book with Victoria Jackson , a well-known kook , crackpot , wacko , and an all around fruitcake. I mean , what were you thinking? Weren’t you worried that people would also think you were a kook , a crackpot , a wacko , and a fruitcake?”

Katie : “Not really , Alex. She’s written some credible books exposing Barack Obama as the fraud that he is , so – “

Alex : “Name one.”

Katie : “Well , how about How Mickey Mouse , Donald Duck , Acorn , and , uh , something , something , I forget the rest of it.”

Victoria : “The Homeless , Illegal Immigrants , And The Walking Dead Helped Obama The Weasel Weasel His Way Into The White House.”

Katie : “Yeah , that’s it.”

Alex : “I can believe that Acorn , the homeless , illegal immigrants , and the walking dead might have been involved with getting Obama into the White house , but Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck? Come on! That’s ridiculous. Was Goofy involved too? How about Pluto?”

Katie : “What?”

Alex : “You don’t seriously believe that Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck had a hand in it , do you?”

Katie : “Well , Alex , there were reports that many of the ballots contained what appeared to be the signatures of assorted Disney characters. I’m not saying that Mickey and Donald actually signed any ballots. Most likely they were wearing costumes , and some people mistook them for the real thing.” 

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Victoria Jackson , the Queen of kooks , crackpots , wackos , and fruitcakes.

Victoria : “Not according to the people I talked to. I talked to five different people , and they all swore they saw Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck not only handing out Acorn ballots , but signing ballots themselves.”  

Alex : “Wow! Five different people?”

Victoria : “Yeah. You think I’m going to write a book without doing some research? Who do you think you’re talking to?”

Alex : “I don’t think I’m talking to a kook , a crackpot , a wacko , and an all around fruitcake. I know I’m talking to a kook , a crackpot , a wacko , and an all around fruitcake , who writes about anything that comes into her empty , crazy head.”

Victoria : “Did you invite me back to make fun of me again , Alex?”

Alex : “You said it , not me.”

Katie : “Alex , can we talk about the book , please?”

Alex : “Alright. Let’s drop the crazy talk and get to some serious business here , the communist Obama selling drugs to Mexican drug cartels. Katie , how do you know Obama has smuggled Mexican drug cartels drugs in bicycles?”

Katie : “Well , we know for a fact that Obama hates America , so it also makes sense that he hates everything else in America , including bicycles.”

Alex : “What does that have to do with smuggling drugs? And why would he hate bicycles? That doesn’t make any sense.”

Katie : “Hold on , I’m getting to it. First he gave them weapons in Fast And Furious , because he hates American gun owners and wants to take all their guns away , and now he’s giving them drugs because he hates bike owners and wants to take their bikes away from them.”

 Alex : “I still don’t get it. He’s giving them drugs because he hates bike owners?”

Victoria : “Yeah. He stole thousands of bicycles and hid drugs inside of them , smuggled them to Mexican drug cartels , because he wanted to justify taking everyone’s bicycles away just like he still wants to take everyone’s guns away.”

Alex : “That doesn’t explain why he hates bike owners.”

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Katie Pavlich , the Queen of cranks , and conspiracy theories.

Katie : “He hates bike owners because a White House staffer named Jake Brewer supposedly died in a bike riding accident during a cancer charity ride last year.”

Victoria : “Yeah. Obama probably had him killed because he’s a communist.”

Alex : “So , Obama stole thousands of bicycles , hid drugs inside of them , and then shipped them off to Mexican cartels because his friend Jake Brewer died in a charity bike ride?”

Katie : “That’s right.”

Alex : “That still doesn’t explain why he hates bike owners.”

Katie : “He hates bike owners like he hates gun owners. He hates gun owners and wants to grab everyone’s guns because he thinks they’re evil. But guns don’t kill people ; people kill people. He feels the same about bicycles. Just because his friend died on one  – “

Victoria : “Supposedly.”

Katie : “Supposedly. Just because his friend died on a bicycle , he thinks they’re evil too , and all of them need to be confiscated like he thinks all guns need to be confiscated.”

Alex : “People think I’m crazy , think I’m nuts , but that is literally one of the craziest things I’ve ever heard. It literally makes no sense. I can believe Obama would smuggle drugs to Mexican cartels because he’s an evil elitist communist who wants to take over America and set up his evil communist , Nazi , Muslim , gay New World Order , but to suggest that he’s smuggling drugs in bicycles because he believes they are just as dangerous as guns , is insane. 

Victoria : “You’re right. Obama is insane , and we have to stop him before it’s too late , or there won’t be anymore guns or bicycles left!”

Alex : “Yeah , Obama is insane , but you two are even more insane for believing this nonsense.”

Victoria : “It’s not nonsense.”

Alex : “Yes , it is. You’re both a couple of kooks , crackpots , wackos , and fruitcakes , who belong in a padded room with all of your readers who are also kooks , crackpots , wackos , and fruitcakes.”

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Posted in Liberal Logic 101

Stupid Conservative Memes #17 … Liberal Logic 101 Edition

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******Straw man******

Actually this is what Conservatives do , not liberals. They condemn all Muslims on the actions of one Muslim terrorist. They defend Conservative terrorists , whether they are white supremacists or anti-government , as lone wolves with mental illness.

 

Posted in satire/humor, Tomi Lahren

White People : The New Victims Of Racism In The Age Of Obama

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Tomi Lahren is a Conservative wing nut commentator  , and the host of her own show Final Thoughts on The Blaze Network. She recently made headlines when she compared the Black Lives Matter movement to the KKK , managing to piss off not only black people and minorities , but white people as well. She recently  criticized Beyonce for her Superbowl half-time tribute to the Black Panthers , and Jessie Williams for his Black Entertainment award speech , accusing them both of being racist against white people.

She also accused Colin Kaepernick of being a whiny-attention-seeking crybaby because he had the audacity to kneel instead of stand during the National Anthem to protest police brutality.

But Tomi , along with her legion of anti-politically correct politically correct followers on twitter , being the real whiny-attention-seeking crybabies , attacked him like rabid dogs using racial epithets and telling him to leave the country if he didn’t like it.

Not only has she insulted black people , she has insulted president Obama on numerous occasions , often referring to him as Barry , blaming him for the Chattanooga military base shooting by a Muslim , the Orlando Florida gay night club shooting , also by a Muslim , the deaths of the Baton Rouge , and Dallas police officers , accusing him of being more sensitive to Muslim terrorists , and of having a ‘friendly to Muslim jihadis’ mentality. In other words , he’s a friend of terrorists for no other reason other than the fact that his name is Barack Hussein Obama.  

She’s written her first book , White People : The New Victims Of Racism In The Age Of Obama , and has appeared on Fox News , and on The Daily Show with Trevor Noah. More recently she appeared on The Blaze’s Glenn Beck  Show to warn Glenn , Stu , Pat , and their audience that Black Lives Matter really is a terrorist group like the KKK , and how they are shooting , lynching , burning , beating up , stabbing , and blowing up white people all over America who support Donald Trump , and white police officers.

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    The Three Amigos , AKA as The Beanie Boys , Stu , Glenn , and Pat.

Glenn : “They really are a terrorist group , aren’t they? The main stream liberal media has been portraying them as heroes , as a civil rights , an equal rights group , but they can’t whitewash the truth.”

Tomi : “That’s right , Glenn. They’re not a civil rights group , they are a proven terrorist group roaming across America , protesting they claim , but what they are really doing is more than just protesting. They’re doing more than just chanting ‘pigs in a blanket , putem in a bag and shakeem up , shakeem up , then fryem like bacon and eatem up , eatem up.’ They’re also looting , destroying property and shooting and lynching and burning white people – and cops – who support white cops and Donald Trump. In fact , they were the ones who encouraged the anti-Trump protesters after he won the election because they hate white people white cops and Trump because they’re racist and hate white cops and white people.”

Pat : “You forgot to mention that they’re also blowing up buildings , leaving anti-white racist graffiti , and blaming it on the KKK , who they’re also blaming for the lynchings. But they’re the new KKK. You said it yourself.”

Tomi : “That’s right. In fact , they’re  worse than the KKK. They’re not only endorsed by the New Black Panthers , and wear black hoods and robes when they loot and destroy and kill and shoot and lynch and burn and beat up  and stab and blow up buildings and white people and cops , but  the New Black Panthers are looting with them , and are destroying and killing and shooting and lynching and burning and beating up and stabbing and blowing up buildings and white people and cops , who make up most of their victims , because they’re racist and hate white people and white cops.” 

Stu : “I can understand that they are killing and shooting and lynching and burning and beating up and stabbing and blowing up people. But beating up and stabbing buildings? That really doesn’t make any sense. Why would someone beat up , and stab a building?”

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Angry white chick , Tomi Lahren explaining Black Lives Matter looters like to beat up and stab buildings when they can’t find white people to beat up and stab.

Tomi :  “Sure it makes sense. Think about it. They’re beating up and stabbing buildings when they can’t find white people and white cops who support Trump to beat up and stab and blow up because they’re racist and hate white people , and they’re beating up and stabbing and blowing up buildings owned by white people because they’re racist and hate white people who own their own businesses because they’re racist and hate white people.”

Stu : ( thinking about it ) “When you put it that way , it does make sense.”

Glenn : “But you won’t hear or see any of this in the liberal media because they support this kind of criminal behavior and don’t want us to know the truth. They want us to believe that Black Lives Matter is a legitimate group with legitimate grievances , and that cops are just killing black people just because they’re racist , and hate black people , but nothing could be further from the truth. We are the real victims of racism. White people are discriminated against not only because of affirmative action , but because of so-called white privilege they believe just because we are white we get everything handed to us on a silver platter. But its black people that get everything handed to them on a silver platter , such as welfare , and food stamps.”

Tomi : “That’s right. In fact , its Black Lives Matter ,  Obama , liberals , and Democrats who are the racists , and we know they also hate cops , and they want to start a race war so they can enforce segregation and slavery and Jim Crow on white people because they want revenge and reparations for being second class citizens because they’re racist and hate white people.”

Posted in Katie Pavlich

Stupid Conservative Memes #15 … Katie Pavlich Edition

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*******Pot meet kettle******

And the way Conservative lame stream media operates is by ignoring facts that don’t support their fantasies :

  • There have been numerous investigative reports concerning the events in Benghazi , the majority of them Republican. There was no stand down order by the Obama administration to allow four Americans to die at the hands of Muslim extremists. There was no scandal. But Conservatives in the media convinced themselves that it was a massive cover-up because Obama sympathizes with Muslim terrorists. 
  • Fast And Furious was a scandal. It was an ATF scandal. But Conservative media again was convinced that Obama had deliberately allowed Mexican drug cartels to get their hands on thousands of firearms for the purpose of disarming American citizens of their second amendment rights and their guns. A conspiracy. But , again , an investigative report was released that was also ignored. Pavlich even published a book about it – Fast And Furious : Barack Obama’s Bloodiest Scandal And It’s Shameless Cover-Up – in which she played fast and furious with the facts. It was debunked the same year the report was released , but millions of wing nuts are to this day convinced of its accuracy.
Posted in Liberal Logic 101

Stupid Conservative Memes #14 … Liberal Logic 101 Edition

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Helping those with no brains understand how logic works.

Slavery wasn’t oppression?

Jim Crow wasn’t oppression?

Institutional racism isn’t a form of oppression?

Black people are just whining about nothing in a society where racism magically doesn’t exist because  minorities  have become highly paid athletes and politicians? 

Posted in Dana Loesch, Tea Party

Stupid Conservative Memes #13 … Dana Loesch Edition

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Dana doesn’t believe that the Republican party is the party of racism and bigotry. She’s one of those Conservatives who believes that the Democratic and Republican Parties are the same today as they were a hundred years ago, that the Southern Strategy never happened , that it’s a liberal myth. It’s not a liberal myth. It’s historical fact.

She also believes there is no evidence of Tea Party racism. That it’s also a liberal conspiracy to make them look bad. 

She’s either a liar , or she really has no clue.

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The protesters in these photos are not Democrats. They are Republicans.  But according to Dana Loesch , and other Conservatives , Tea Partiers aren’t racist at all. It’s not only liberals who are the racists , but Barack Obama because he attended a black church in Chicago , committed the unforgivable sin of criticizing a white police officer in 2009 ( James Crowley ) , and because he had the sheer audacity to voice his empathy for a murdered teenager ( Trayvon Martin ) and his family.